The place where peace found, The place where i found myself again, The place where my crying means a lot, The place where is it that makes me want to focus on my deen.
can i tell you and sharing my experience, Do you still remember the 6th pillar of faith? Which is to believe in Qada and Qadar. Before Umrah, there were a lot of unexpected incidents such as at the beginning my family chose the wrong โtravelโ , and alhamdulillah it ended in the right โtravelโ, on a week before Umrah my cousinโs grandfather died (He should also go together), then five days before Umrah my grandfather was sick, so my mother didnโt go with me there to take care of her father by letting go of what she had paid, I cried a lot and had to be a parent during the trip for my siblings.
But alhamdulillah everything there felt easy, everything felt like everything that happened had a meaning behind it. Alhamdulillah I can pray in the garden of paradise in raudah, I can pray in hijr ismail, I can kiss hajar aswad with easily. When i already there, I really canโt stop crying, I miss my father, I want to meet him (Itโs impossible because he canโt possibly come back to life) but people say they can meet anyone here, I pray every day I really want to see my father. I took my umrah 2 times, first for myself and the second I took badal for my father, every day I wish there was someone similar to him, even if I donโt have time to talk with him I just want to see people who look alike enough. when I took badal for him I really hoped he existed. But I didnโt find anyone who was similar to him. Until I realised that I found my fatherโs strong, who diligently worshipped there. I found him in myself, I cried when I knew that. It means even though my father is no longer there, but he is always here, in myself. Itโs really an experience that changed the way I look at myself and the world.
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ุง ูุฏุฑ ุงููููฐู ูู ุงูุฃูุถู
Itโs a beautiful feeling when you understand the qadr of Allah swt. Whatever happens, alhamdulillah it happens for the best donโt over think it.
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